So last night I was watching Lie to Me, and these 2 people got married.
I'm not sure how I started thinking about this, pretty sure it was a huge rabbit trail of thoughts..
But I was texting Jonah when I thought of it, so I asked him. He gave me about 5 texts worth of "THAT IS A GOOD QUESTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and told me he wouldn't say anything unless I posted it on my blog :P
So here it is:
[ Is it wrong to lust over your spouse? ]
You'd think once you're married you won't have to be too concerned about sexual sin (unless it's obviously directed at other people other than your spouse :P), but I'm curious what you guys think :D
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Lust: To have an eager, passionate, and especially an inordinate or sinful desire, as for the gratification of the sexual appetite or of covetousness; -- often with after.
Covet: to desire wrongfully, inordinately, or without due regard for the rights of others: to covet another's property.
Based on those two definitions-- Your spouse "belongs" to you so coveting your spouse isn't really a possibility, therefore, I don't believe lusting (in the sense of an intense passion for someone) over your spouse is wrong
I do love this question! And I'm impressed you thought of it. I had never thought of it until Prager talked about it one time. And, to all of ya'lls dismay, I take a slightly different position than Prager.
Prager dealt with the issue on a male/female hour. Someone had called in and asked if it was okay to lust after one's spouse. Prager immediately answered with an emphatic "yes". He went on to say that it is one of the best possible things in a marriage to lust after eachother.
Now here is where I differ, although differ is not the right word. I just see it from a slightly different angle.
Lust, to me, has to involve sin. It is basically selfish sexual desire, as opposed to loving sexual desire. This isn't to say married people can't have sex because its enjoyable to them- only that one spouse can't "use" the other for selfish reasons. (An example would be completely disassociating the person from the body and only gaining pleasure from the act). That being said, however, just because one spouse isn't in the "mood" doesn't mean they shouldn't consent to the other if it means a happier, healthier relationship. The best marriages have active sexual lives ;) Sorry, but its true.
Now I think where Prager and I "differ" is that he just has a broader definition of "lust". He sees is as intense sexual desire. There is only good to come of a "lustful" attitude towards your wife, assuming you aren't "using" her. But fantasizing, "oggling" over her, etc. is just fine and even quite healthy for a marriage.
If any of you haven't heard the male/female hour, I'd strongly recommend you try it sometime. It deals with issues like these, sometimes dealing within the sexual arena, but just as often not. Great thoughts on the opposite sex, marital issues, dating, morals, kids, sexual tension, how men and women are different, and more. All dealt with very maturely and honestly. And its quite interesting as well ;)
Go to www.pragerradio.com and you can find them for free under "podcast".
Post a Comment